Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Program

  • At a traditional Jewish wedding, the bride's side is on the right (if you're facing the chuppah) and the groom's is on the left. (Note that this is opposite of a traditional Christian ceremony.
  • A traditional Jewish wedding is full of meaningful rituals, symbolizing the beauty of the relationship of husband and wife, as well as their obligations to each other and to the Jewish people. The Wedding Day. The dawning wedding day heralds the happiest and holiest day of one's life.

Rabbi Andrea Frank - The Jewish Wedding Traveling Rabbi is a wedding officiant located in New York, New York. When you work with Rabbi Andrea, you will receive a customized wedding ceremony. She is happy to officiate all types of weddings, whether you are a Jewish couple or interfaith couple.

Wondering what all the traditions really mean? Get the lowdown on your Jewish ceremony here.

Mazel Tov, darlings, you're getting married! You've picked out invitations, auditioned the band, and you're on your way to the perfect wedding. Everything is planned, save for the set of essential details that will turn your big day into a timeless, spiritual event. We're talking minhag, baby: the Jewish wedding customs that create a meaningful link between past, present, and future.

The Tish

A traditional Jewish wedding begins with a groom's tish, Yiddish for table. The groom attempts to present a lecture on the week's Torah portion, while his male friends and family heckle and interrupt him. Meanwhile, the bride is entertained in another room by her female friends and family. Bride and groom may lead the tish together in Conservative and Reform congregations.

The Ketubah Signing

In Orthodox communities, after the tish the ketubah (Jewish marriage contract) is signed by the groom, the rabbi, and two male witnesses. In Reform and Conservative congregations, the bride may also sign the ketubah, and additonal lines can be added for female witnesses, too. Despite its testimony that the groom has 'acquired' the bride, the ketubah is all about the bride's rights and her willingness to take part in the marriage. In fact, the ketubah belongs solely to the bride and is hers to keep as proof of her rights and the groom's responsibilities to her under Jewish law.

The B'deken

The first time a bride and groom see each other in an Orthodox wedding is during the b'deken, or veiling of the bride. Both fathers and all the men lead the groom to the bride's room, where both mothers and all the women surround her. The groom lowers the veil over her face, setting her apart from everyone else and indicating that he is solely interested in her inner beauty. The ceremony is based on the biblical story in which Jacob did not see his bride's face beforehand and was tricked into marrying the wrong sister, Leah. Some couples have created a more egalitarian veiling ceremony in which the bride places a yarmulke on the groom as he covers her with the veil.

The Huppah

The huppah, or wedding canopy, dates back to the tent-dwelling Jewish nomadic days in the desert. Historically, Jewish wedding ceremonies were held outdoors, and the huppah created an intimate, sanctified space. The canopy offers one of the best opportunities to personalize your ceremony. Since there are no formal requirements for its size, shape, or appearance, you can make your own huppah.

Circling

When the couple first enters the huppah, the bride circles the groom seven times, representing the seven wedding blessings and seven days of creation, and demonstrating that the groom is the center of her world. To make the ancient ritual reciprocal, many couples opt to circle each other.

Kiddushin

The kiddushin (betrothal ceremony) takes place under the huppah. It begins with greetings, a blessing over the wine, and a sip taken by the bride and groom. Next come the rings: The groom recites an ancient Aramaic phrase as he places the wedding band on his bride's right index finger -- the finger believed to be directly connected to the heart. In a double-ring ceremony (not permitted in some Orthodox weddings) the bride also places a ring on the grooms index finger while repeating a feminine form of the Aramaic phrase, or a biblical verse from Hosea or Song of Songs. The ketubah is then read aloud in English and Aramaic.

Sheva B'rachot

The sheva b'rachot, or seven blessings, consist of praise for God, a prayer for peace in Jerusalem, and good wishes for the couple. In Sephardic weddings, before the sheva b'rachot are recited, the parents wrap the couple in a tallis, literally binding them together. The rabbi doesn't have to say all seven blessings. You can honor special guests by asking them to read -- or even sing -- some of the blessings.

Breaking of the Glass

Nothing says 'Jewish wedding' more than the sound of breaking glass. But what's the point? Depending on whom you ask, the breaking of the wineglass is, among other things: a symbol of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem; a representation of the fragility of human relationships; and a reminder that marriage changes the lives of individuals forever. It's also the official signal to shout, 'Mazel Tov!' and start partying. There's no law putting the man's foot to the task. If you're game, bride and groom can break the glass together with one swift kick in unison.

The Yihud

In a day filled with chaos, the yihud -- or 'seclusion' -- is a standout ritual that lets you focus on the days true purpose: your new partnership. Immediately after the ceremony, bride and groom retreat to a private room for 15 minutes of personal time. No in-laws, no seating arrangement charts, no videographer. Just you and your new spouse staring into each other's eyes. In days of old, bride and groom would retreat to a nearby tent for a little undercover nookie action. This isn't done much these days, but its customary for newlyweds to seize the yihud moment and feed each other a bite or two of their first meal together.

Read on for a helpful Reform Jewish wedding program template.

Religious elements or traditions can enrich a wedding ceremony, but determining what to include in the program to reflect your beliefs as a couple can be difficult. We've gathered sample programs from several religions to get you started. Use them as a guide and add your own spin to make your day truly personal. Below is some helpful sample wording for a traditional Reform Jewish wedding program.

Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Program

Front Cover

Wedding of

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name


Date

Temple Name

City, State

Inside Page 1

The Wedding Processional

Rabbi

Cantor

Name Bride's grandmother

Name Bride's grandfather

Name Groom's grandmother

Name Groom's grandfather


Bridesmaids

Name Relation to the Bride

Name Relation to the Bride

Name Relation to the Bride

Name Relation to the Bride

Name Relation to the Bride


Woman of Honor

Name Relation to the Bride


Groomsmen

Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Program

Name Relation to the Groom

Name Relation to the Groom

Name Relation to the Groom

Name Relation to the Groom

Name Relation to the Groom


Best Man

Name Relation to the Groom


Groom's Name

will walk to the huppah with his parents,

Father's Name

and

Mother's Name


Bride's Name

will walk to the huppah with her parents,

Father's Name

and

Mother's Name

Inside Page 2–3

Jewish Reform Ceremony Explanation (Optional)

Wedding Ceremony

A Jewish wedding is not merely between two individuals, or their families and circle of friends; it is a cause of celebration for the entire Jewish people. A wedding is not just about two people finding happiness; it's more about the potential of this couple to make the world a better place by the virtue of being together as one.

It is a Jewish belief that when two people who are destined for each other get married, they complete one another.


The marriage of

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

was blessed at

Temple Name

on

Date

in a ceremony called

aufruf

during which

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

were called to the

bimah

and given honors before the Torah.


Prior to the ceremony, the civil marriage license was witnessed and signed by

Witness' Name

and

Witness' Name

The ketubah (Jewish marriage document)

was witnessed and signed by

Witness' Name

and

Witness' Name

The ketubah was traditionally a revolutionary concept, protecting the bride's rights and obligating the husband to look out for her welfare. Today, the ketubah reflects the equality of bride and groom and reflects their mutual obligations to each other.


The wedding takes place under the huppah, symbolic of the home

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

Jewish Wedding Ceremony Template

will build together. The huppah has no walls; the marriage begins with just a roof, and

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

Wedding

will build the walls with love and friendship, based on a foundation of respect and trust. The huppah is open on all sides so that family and friends will always feel welcome.


A blessing of

krikat erusin,

or betrothal, is recited over the wine, followed by another in praise of God, who brought

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

together.

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

drink from the same cup of wine to represent the life that they will share from this day forth.


Next comes the giving and accepting of rings. Jewish custom requires that wedding bands be made of a single piece of metal with no adornments breaking the circle, representing the wholeness achieved through marriage and the hope for an unbroken union.

Groom's Name

will place the ring on

Bride's Name's

right index finger to represent that marriage is an act of law, saying, “Behold, you are set apart for me with this ring according to the laws of Moses and Israel.' After reciting his vow, he will transfer the ring to its permanent place on her left ring finger to represent that the marriage is an act of love. The bride does the same to the groom. The

ketubah

is then read and presented to

Bride's Name.

After the chanting of the seven marriage blessings—

shva b'rachot

—the couple drinks from a second cup of wine.

Sample Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony


At the conclusion of the ceremony,

Groom's Name

will step on a glass and break it. This ancient practice has many interpretations. One of the most traditional is that it reminds us of the destruction of the holy temple in Jerusalem and the many losses that have been suffered by the Jewish people. Another explanation is that love, like glass, is very fragile and must be protected because, once broken, it is hard to put back together again. A more contemporary interpretation is that the sound travels through time and space to share their joy with all who have loved them, both those who are separated by distance and those separated by time. Immediately following the ceremony,

Bride's Name

and

Groom's Name

will leave the huppah and spend their first few minutes as husband and wife alone together in a private place. This is called

Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Script

yichud,

Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Program

or seclusion.

Reform Jewish Wedding Ceremony Script


Special thanks to Rabbi Paul Swerdlow, Northport, New York